Daria: Am I Home Yet?
by Americana127
Summary: Daria is in constant rebellion of the world...but what if she wasn't as different to everyone as she thought. Imagine there was someone out there so similar to her, they were identical. Daria finds out she has a secret British twin Ingrid whom of which happens to to turn her entire world upside down.


With two hands firmly gripping the drinks she had just purchased, Jane Lane scanned the foggy room of The Moody Mistress in search of her friend. It was in this dingy secluded Boston pub where they had agreed to meet after their first mid-term apart from each other at separate colleges, Raft and BFAC. Initially they had planned to convene at least once a week for a formal discussion of complaint over pizza concerning the unbearably stressful and tormenting college lives they were about to embark; unfortunately most pre-college proposals never seem to follow-through as intended.

That is why Jane so eagerly strained her eyes for a glimpse of the best friend she had missed so much over the past few weeks. With the P.A speakers blaring out their favourite dirty angst-ridden grunge melodies and the alternately dressed college students keeping to themselves, it was the perfect place for the pair to meet, away from the 'other world' in which popularity and artificiality ruled over its shallow indoctrinates. And any minute she should show.

Jane took a sip of her drink warily. She had simply asked the heavily pierced bartender for "alcohol" and from the sour expression sweeping her face, that is definitely what she had received.

"What's with the face?" a familiar monotone drone asked "you look like your under duress to rub up against Upchuck's bare naked armpit..".

Jane composed herself and looked up, "Ahh and so the wrath of Morgendorffer returns!" she grinned slyly.

Daria sat down in the booth next to Jane and accepted the offered drink. She swirled it round cautiously and sniffed it before recoiling in disgust.

"Ugh, I should have known this reunion was going to end in my demise! BFAC run out of paint and had to supply it's students with poison..?" Daria questioned.

Jane rolled her eyes "It's alcohol Daria, surely even those privileged intellects at Raff have dabbled in the dark arts of Vodka?".

"..Privileged? And no, actually I have'nt had time with my essay's and Tara's essay and Lisa's and Jo's…".

"Dear oh dear, you've shamelessly reverted back to your high school money making schemes by illegally passing cheats through the college system haven't you?" Jane said, pretending to shake her head in disapproval "and I thought you had reformed..".

"Well a girl's gotta' eat right?" Daria replied shrugging.

Smirking, Jane took another swig of the toxic concoction in her hand and looked expectantly at Daria. She also looked down at the liquid swirling in her glass and sighing, pressed her lips to the edge. Then very slowly she tilted the glass and let the smallest drop run down her throat. Jane stared quizzically and raised an eyebrow in anticipation of Daria's reaction. But none came…or so she thought.

Daria placed the glass back down on the table and wiped her mouth with back or her hand. Her still face represented that of stone and utter boredom. Then she cracked.

The trail of vodka began to ignite her tongue then throat and stomach. Surprised by the taste she coughed and spluttered all across the table so violently that her glasses came off and her eyes began to water uncontrollably. Stunned by the sight, Jane crippled over in laughter clenching her stomach with her free hand reaching for the glasses. A huge tear rolled down her cheek as she witnessed one of the funniest visions she could imagine of her best friend.

"No, haha.. ha .. No- stop my eyeliners running!" she laughed breathlessly.

Daria wiped her own eyes and snatched the glasses back off of Jane frowning. Then she stood up as if to walk away.

"I'll be leaving now" she mumbled in the same monotone.

Jane caught her arm and pulled her back to her seat, "Daria wait..haha, I'm sorry, don't leave" she managed to say between fits of laughter.

Daria sat back down and folded her arms scowling grumpily. Of course she would be the laughing stock of the night, even though she had escaped the viscous clicks and popularity visionaries of Lawndale High, this messed up world would always find a way to pull one over on her.

"Oh come on Daria it wasn't that bad, lighten up!" Jane said, finally finished chuckling.

"Yeah I guess.." Daria grumbled. Then she noticed Jane's smile start to slip. Sighing, she said "So come on how are you possibly managing without me anyway, had any more girls hit on you like at art camp last fall?".

The smile re-emerged on her face "Funny you should say that, luckily there haven't been any female pursuers however BFAC is swarming with hot guys" Jane replied, winking.

"Oh Dear, how and why did I manage to allow myself to immerse in the prolific turmoil that is 'boy talk'".

"Not still hung up on young Tomas are ya'?"

"…not really. Seeing as we ended appropriately and axiomatically on good terms I'm fine with it, I'm just not looking to engage myself in a follow up relationship right now- erm excuse me"

A tall, dark figure had squeezed uncomfortabley close to Daria on the seat next to her. Across from the table another tall guy with fair hair and brown eyes had done the same to Jane who was looking at him in bemusement.

"…Can we help you?" she asked the pair of intruders.

"Heeey, would you girls dance…with us?" the blonde one replied.

Jane looked to Daria and raised her eyebrow "Well if it will help, why not?" she said shrugging.

She took another swig of her drink and made to stand up. The fair haired guy also stood up to let her out.

"C'mon Daria, you fancy a little grunge swaying on the dance floor?"

"I would honestly rather rub petrol on my face and set it alight. But don't let me stop you from participating in certain humility with these two drunken strangers." she said frowning yet again.

"Ahh how I have missed your cynical outlook at the world as the realist you are" Jane said smiling fondly, "I'll be back after the next song".

She got up and left with the blonde haired guy and walked towards the dance floor, drink in hand. This left Daria and the guy to sit in momentary awkward silence.

"Soo, you gonna drink that miss?" the remaining guy said in his strong Californian accent pointing to Daria's drink.

She scowled at him angrily. She hadn't had any intent on consuming the liquid but why should she give it to this stranger whom was so selfishly asking for it, just like the Lawndale idiots. And why shouldn't she do something stupid like everyone else anyway, there's clearly no avoiding the shallowness of society- even Jane had got up and left her!

"Yeah I am" she replied hotly and looked at the glass.

Already knowing it tasted horrible, she picked it up and started to drain the whole thing in one go to avoid tasting it.

Her face crumpled and she shook slightly at the sharp flavour before regaining control.

"Wow.." the guy said.

Daria looked at him and burst out laughing. He shifted back in shock and embaressment.

"Erm calm down miss, your being really too very loud.."

That just made her laugh louder "And your being illiterate!" she said while tears started dripping her glasses.

"You're really a strange girl" he said before getting up and walking away.

She suddenly felt like crying. Why had he left her alone? Why wasn't she good enough to keep anyone? Tom…he was perfect and she couldn't accept him because of his family…what was wrong with her? The tears of laughter soon turned to tears of sorrow as she randomly started to think of the comments people had made to her in the past…"brain", "misery chic" "weirdo". Their all right. I am weird she thought.

If only she was born into the world beautiful like her sister Quinn, then everything would be easy; they would all just adore her and make life so simple for her. If only she wasn't the ugly sister! Ugly. That's all she was inside and out. That's why she hadn't made any friends at college, well, not real ones. Not like Jane.

And then she looked up and saw Jane dancing. Just seeing her made her realise that it was because her and Jane were best friends. Really she guessed she had made quite a few good friends at college the more she thought about it. For some reason the instant depression she was feeling left just as quickly. And she felt…adventurous?

A rare mischievous grin spread across her face and she clambered up onto the table, almost slipping on the beer mat as she did. The Smashing Pumpkins 'Today' started playing through the speakers and it was a song she just so happened to know the words to. It was then for the first time probably in her entire life for- enjoyment- …that she started screaming at the top her lungs.

"Today is the greatest! Day I've ever known!" She slurred, still standing on top of the table where she began to dance. In a very odd fashion.

At that point almost all of the people in the pub turned in her direction and started cheering her on and joining in with her hype. To which she played up to and started screaming the lyrics even louder. For the first time in her life she was putting herself willingly in the attention of others…and she loved it. But she was also most certainly drunk.

While she was jumping around she felt a hand grip her ankle and try to tug her down. This made her realise just how dizzy she felt and when she looked down, her sense of balance seemed to evade her.

"Daria! What are you doing!? Get down!" a girl shouted at her.

She soon realised it was Jane.

"Oh hey Jane, look I decided to dance! And I finished the drink thank you very much!"

Jane put her hand to her head in shame and started shaking her head.

"Look I'm sorry, your really gonna hate me tomorrow..but your such a light-wieght!" she called to her frowning. "Now come down!".

Daria stood still for a minute and contemplated what Jane had just said. Then she closed her eyes. Big mistake.

The room began to spin uncontrollably and before she knew it she was falling from the table. Her eyes snapped shut as she braced herself for the painful face-plant that was about to occur and she stuck her arms out awkwardly to soften the blow.

Just as she thought her face would make contact with the wooden floorboards, she felt herself fall against something quite the opposite; cushion-like and warm. Whatever she was leaning against felt so comfy that she couldn't even bring herself to open her eyes and before she knew it she had drifted into a mild slumber.

Little did she know that the 'thing' she had fallen into was in fact the arms of her former crush, and Jane's brother, Trent. He had just been doing a one-off DJing set in the pub when he noticed a distressed girl dancing on the table. To his surprise he quickly realised, as unlikely as it was, that the girl was his kid sister's best friend. It was definitely a sight he had never in his lifetime imagined to become reality.

He knew instantly that she must have been drunk because there would have been no other explanation for Daria to act so outgoing or humanly idiotic and so he rushed to collect her before she caused herself any damage. This was going to be a terribly uncomfortable ride if she woke up but he knew he had to take her out of this pub before they got thrown out. The fact that he was carrying her only made it worse, for some reason she had the tendency to act a little odd around him…  
"Jane, have you guys been drinking?" he said.

"Well it is a pub Trent" she replied, running beside him as he carried her friend to his car.

"Yeah, but you know Daria doesn't drink, it was kinda stupid giving her straight vodka…" he droned and noticed Jane frowning.

"Like you and Jesse are so responsible" she murmured.

She took the car keys from Trent and opened the door where he laid her on the back seat.

"Ok thanks I'll take her back to mine now, can I borrow your car?" she asked.

Trent squinted his eyes suspiciously and leaned towards her. "You've already being drinking too, there's no way I'm letting you drive Janey…you might scratch my car".

She raised her eyebrows in disbelief and took an obvious look towards the side of his car that was covered in bumps and scratches.

"I'm going to get my money from doing the set, wait here" he said and then noticing the keys on the back seat, he reached across and grabbed them.

"Don't trust me?" Jane teased and Trent flicked his eyes across to Daria then back at his sister "Yeah okay" she said rolling her eyes and clambered into the backseat with Daria.

After tidying up her make-up and hair in the wing mirror for about ten minutes, Jane noticed Daria begin to stir. She dizzily adjusted her glasses and tried (and failed) to sit up in an orderly fashion.

She groaned and then asked with a boozy voice "Did you carry me here?".

Jane knew she would freak out at her even more tomorrow if she found out that Trent had carried her in this drunk state so she just nodded.

"Oh thankkss, I love you Jane" Daria slurred.

Jane giggled nervously and patted Daria's head tentatively as she began to fall back to sleep.

"Well ya kinda freakin' me out a little there amigo. But don't worry I know its just the booze talking" she said winking even though Daria's eyes were closed. "We'll hang out tomorrow and catch up properly- over pizza! Just as God intended" she smiled and let her eyelids drift a little too. College had been pretty tiring and she never really got her required twelve hours shut eye anymore. And she wasn't about to now.

Daria punched her in the arm "Ow what's the deal!?" Jane said.

"who is that?" Daria said angrily pointing out of the window, "You didn't carry me it was Trent!".

Jane looked out of the window and saw Trent walking towards them. oh…dear she thought.

Suddenly Daria began to sob. Loudly. It was definitely due to the intoxication of the alcohol as no real tears were actually forming.

"Shh, c'mon play it cool Dar" Jane hushed.

This seemed to make things worse, just as Trent opened the door.

"…Daria!?" he said in shock, "Are you…? Whats happening?".

"I don't know she just started crying hysterically!" Jane shouted over Daria's sobs.

Trent stood bewildered for a moment then opened the back door. He stood hesitantly looking upon the bawling teen then took a deep breathe and got in to sit next to her. She started to quieten down and he dared to put a hand on her shoulder. This made her stop still in her tracks and the waterworks turned off immediately.

Jane and Trent exchanged perplexed looks then shockingly to them both, Daria rested her head on Trent's chest and closed her eyes.

"…right" Trent said uncomfortably.

"…right" Jane replied.

Then silence.

"Say Janey…you haven't drunk that much have you?" Trent asked.

"I'd say I've drunk a little less than the limit of which my being able to drive at a controlled pace would fall under concern," she replied.

"…right. Well its just she's all settled and-"

"We wouldn't want her to wake up and start screaming again now would we?" Jane finished while Trent gave Daria a sceptical look "keys." Jane ordered which her hand outstretched.

Trent carefully reached into his pocket and fished out his keys whilst trying not to wake Daria. He got them and dropped them into Jane's hand. She looked at the pair of them and sniggered before climbing into the front seat. Trent couldn't help smiling back as he stared down upon the sleeping bundle on his chest. He slowly put his arm around her to cuddle her in and a small grin formed on Daria's supposedly sleeping face.

1 Barton Farm, Brentworth  
Warwickshire  
England

About 5½ thousand miles away on a farm in England, a young girl not too much unlike Daria rose from her bed. She had just been woken to the usual drab sound of the cows complaining in her field and she was definitely not in the mood to be dealing with any chores or farm work today.

Groaning, she walked over to the long, full-sized mirror that hung on her wardrobe door and pushed the hair out from her bleary eyes. Staring back at her, a fairly short seventeen year old girl with long brunette locks of thick sweeping hair, colourless and pale downwardly arched lips and stone dead eyes began rubbing her face, yawning. what a truly gracing sight to look upon this fine morning she thought in her dull drawling British accent.

She turned to the stereo on her drawers and played it full blast. 'Splendora' started booming through the speakers and she quickly ran to her bed and pulled a black case from underneath. Inside there sat a black bass layered with stickers from cartoon shows and bands and other random pictures that she had put on to cover the horrible love heart that had been painted onto the body. It was kind of a cheap impulse buy and she hadn't noticed it when she first bought it but anything even slightly 'girly' was an instant off-put for her.

Behind the case she dragged out an old practise amp and jack lead which she plugged into the bass and strapped on. Then just as the bass on the track was about to kick in she turned the amp on and the volume up on her own bass. She looked into the mirror and frowned even deeper, perfect bass face she thought then started playing along.

'In The Grass' was currently her favourite album and inspired much of her own music in the band she was in: 'Omen Road Explosion" or ORE. The name was pretty forced in a way as the band just really wanted the name to include "explosion". It just sounded cool.

Suddenly the girl felt a literal twinge in her heart and sighed. Every morning it was compulsory for her to take her medication before participating in even the slightest physical activity. The medication included a shot to the arm with an injection of some concoction that she had never really been interested in finding out about, she just knew it helped release a steady flow of oxygen to her weak old heart.

Much to her dismay she turned the bass back off and reached for the shot. Sometimes she wondered why it had to be her with the condition; everyday and night having to take the shot, never being allowed to engage in the more exciting activities with her friends, having parents that worked her like a servant and last and definitely worst of all, having the name Ingrid! It also always felt like something was missing in her life. She had no siblings and life was often lonely on the farm when she wasn't at college or with the band.

That was something she had to look forward to though; Ingrid and her band were flying out to America to go and play some huge grunge festival in Maine where they could go and hang out with a load bands, camp and drink beer whilst listening to music. Of course Ingrid didn't actually drink as it was too much of a health risk but at least she'll be rocking out on stage in America! It was always a dream of hers to live in the USA, there was just something about it that called to her. Like she belonged there or something.

After yanking the shot out of her arm and placing it carefully into a container, she lolled back on her bed and let her mind slip into a daydream; thinking about the journey she was going to make.


End file.
